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.The non-Karno people were not aware that the lower levels were strictly for the senior performers, of course, so I found myself cheerfully crammed on the open top deck between the celebrated Mr Elen and Miss Lloyd, who waved at a few dozen star spotters on the pavement below.Off we rattled over the river towards Camberwell, and I took the opportunity to introduce myself to the great Marie.“Miss Lloyd?” I said.“We haven’t met, although I have written to you to thank you for your generosity when my knee was broken.I am Arthur Dandoe.”“Of course you are!” the great comedienne cried.“I recognises you, Arthur, an’ I recalls your letter.Most gracious it was.I’m very pleased to make your acquaintance at last.”“Let me say again how grateful I am for your help,” I said.“It was much appreciated.”“Well,” Marie said, leaning in and confiding in hushed tones.“What you did was much appreciated by me, and all of Edith’s friends, so let’s say no more about it.”She patted me on the chest in a friendly manner, and I only discovered later that she had slipped a five-pound note into my inside pocket.I did feel something of a fraud, I must confess.Didn’t give it back, though.The Fun Factory was transformed for the reception, with cream-coloured ribbons and yellow flowers, and running along the back wall was the big backdrop from The Football Match, which had been painted over so that the crowd were sporting buttonholes and top hats.I was seated with Edith Karno and her party, next to Freddie and across from Clara and Charley Bell.They were all delighted to see me and treated me like some kind of martyred hero, which was a little embarrassing.The wedding party processed to the top table, and as they did so some unseen hand flicked a switch on the big fans so that the arms on the backdrop waved in the air.Nice effect.Alf and Amy made their way to the position of honour, wreathed in smiles.Then came Karno and Maria, who tried to ignore our table completely as they passed, but Karno caught sight of me there and turned to stare, his eyes narrowing in surprise.I stared right back.I didn’t work for him any more, and I didn’t care what he thought of me.Then came the bridesmaids, two of Amy’s sisters and – my goodness! – Tilly Beckett, looking a real picture, with her hair fully restored to its natural golden colour, and her green eyes twinkling with happiness for her friend.I couldn’t take my eyes off her.As luncheon was served I turned to Freddie.“That crowd scene will need a bit of cleaning up after this, won’t it?” I said.“Oh, The Football Match is long gone,” Freddie said.“Did you not hear?”“Hear?” I asked.“Hear what?”“Oh well, a few days after that business at the Oxford – must have been the very day you left for Cambridge, I should think – young Chaplin went down with bad laryngitis.Couldn’t say a dicky bird.Well, if only you hadn’t…” He waved a fork at my knee, and I completed his thought.“…hadn’t been crocked, I would have been right there to step in, wouldn’t I?” I sighed.“So, what, Will Poluski did it? Or who?”“No, the Guv’nor pulled the show entirely, scrapped it, cancelled all the bookings.”“He did what?”“He got wind that some of those football fellows had mucked about with the shows because of some gambling scheme that they had cooked up, and he was so furious that he took it as a perfect opportunity to sack them all.I’ve never seen him so angry.He swears he’ll never employ any of them ever again.”Ha, I thought.Retribution! Justice! Comeuppance! Eat that, you money-grabbing swine!“Do you know, I thought it might be that way,” I said.“So Billy Wragg broke my knee on purpose, d’you think?”Freddie shrugged.“That one was sacked before the curtain hit the apron,” he said.“The Guv’nor did it himself.He was livid.”I could see Syd and Charlie Chaplin sitting together at the opposite side of the room.“So, if not The Football Match, what is Charlie doing now?”“New piece,” Freddie said, chomping on a bit of beef.“Called Skating.On roller skates.Two companies.Syd’s number one of one, and Charlie’s the number one of the other.”Suddenly I didn’t feel like finishing my food.After the meal there were speeches, of course.I remember Karno’s best man speech well.He seemed to have the idea that we would like to hear a speech about himself, rather than the bride or groom particularly.After all, Alf and Amy worked for him fifty-two weeks of the year, so his story was their story, in a way, was how he set it up.He told us a tale of how he had first come to London.Like many successful fellows, he enjoyed laying it on about how poor he had been to begin with, and even reverted to his thicker accent to remind us of his humble roots.He’d found himself on his uppers, and he and a pal had decided to work their way down to the capital to try their fortune.Young Karno had got hold of a glazier’s kit, and they tramped from town to town mending windows and getting by that way.Until they hit a rough patch.“We come to this village, see,” the Guv’nor recounted, one thumb tucked into his waistcoat.“And we hadn’t a bean, not even t’ price of a cup o’ tea, and there was no jobs to do.So we sat there on a wall, glum like, an’ I says to Tom: ‘See that shop winder over there? That winder could just break tonight, and in t’ morning they’d be glad to ’ave it fixed [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]