[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
."Denise thought about this a minute and chewed lightly on her bottom lip."Her condition is deteriorating again, isn't she?"Randa reached out and pulled the poet to her."Oh, love, I'm so sorry.I know we had hoped she wouldn't progress to this point so quickly."The nurse felt the brunette choke back a sob as she asked, "How long do you think she has? She won't suffer, will she? I don't know if I could stand that."Randa pulled back to look into tear filled blue eyes."I don't know how long Sara has, Denise, but I want you to know one thing for sure.We will not let Sarasuffer.We will see her through this no matter what it takes and she will know she is loved and cared for in whatever time she has left."Denise swallowed hard and nodded.She moved away from Randa and stood up."I need to go downstairs and get the fire going in the living room." Thenurse could only watch as the brunette left the room wiping the tears from her eyes.You've handled everything by yourself for so long you have no idea how to let someone in, even now.Let me help, Denise.Let my love help you throughthis.Randa sighed and left the bed, knowing she needed to find the key to getting the poet to open up to her and let the hurt and anger out.***Throughout the day, Randa made several attempts to get Denise to talk about what she was feeling.The poet gently rebuffed those attempts, saying shewas fine and just needed some time to think through the things that had occurred in the space of the last day.Dr.Macarthur visited and ordered the C-PAP, agreeing with Randa's assessment of the older woman's respiratory system.He asked about Sara's food intake.The pair admitted Sara'sswallowing difficulties were more noticeable again and they had been forced to change her diet to only soft and liquid foods.Denise repeated thequestion she had asked Randa earlier."How long?"Dr.Macarthur looked uncomfortable as he said, "It's difficult to say.Maybe days, maybe weeks.Everything will depend on the progression of theweakening of the breathing muscles.I'm going to prescribe Sara a mild sedative.Many times patients who feel their breathing is failing have problemswith panic at some point.The sedative can help her get through those times.Denise, are you sure you still want to care for Sara at home? I could arrangefor a bed in hospital if you'd like.""No!" Denise replied angrily."No hospital! Sara is my family, she stays here in her home as I promised!" The poet walked angrily from the room and Dr.Macarthur turned to Randa."I didn't mean to offend her, but you and I know how difficult this is going to get.How is Denise holding up?""About as well as can be expected given the circumstances.She's been so independent for so long it's hard for her to accept help.She made a hugeleap by letting me stay and help with Sara.I only wish it was easier for her to talk about it, she keeps the hurtful feelings bottled up and tries to deal withthem on her own.""I can see that.Well, here is the prescription.You know, you two are doing a very impressive job with Sara.Let me know if there are any more changes orif you need anything at all."Randa saw the doctor out and wandered back into the house, finding Denise sitting on the couch staring into the fire in the living room.The nurse satquietly next to the brunette and rested her head on Denise's shoulder.The poet said nothing, but reached for Randa's hand and held it tightly."I love you, Denise Jennings," Randa said simply.Denise turned slightly, kissed the blond woman's head and rested her cheek there."Thank you for that," Denise said.The two sat silently watching the fire, no more words passing between them.***It was early evening, two days after the C-PAP had been delivered and while Randa was working and Sara was asleep, Denise sat out on the step of theback door.The days were just starting to grow longer and there was still enough light outside to provide adequate vision for Denise.Sitting with her legsstretched out upon the pathway, the poet studied the overgrown, shabby garden.It had been neglected over the winter months and now stood as ashadow of the pruned and sculpted beauty it used to be.DJ knew Sara would have tended her garden all through the winter, keeping what was almost anobsession, a sight of perfection.From the rambling rose bushes and perfect lawn, to the small orchard at the bottom of the garden.Sara dedicated muchof her time tending to her passion.Rising to her feet Denise slipped the monitor to her side and turned on the outdoor light by the switch next to the back door.She then pulled the doorclosed and walked out in to the garden.Pushing her hands into her pocket to ward off the evening chill, Denise strode down the garden path.Light trousers and a short-sleeved top did notprovide adequate warmth for the weather.DJ was overwhelmed by the state of Sara's garden and for once she was glad her aunt wouldn't be able to seeit [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]